Who Really Am I? The Answer to the Question Our Soul Seeks

When I was sixteen years old, I started asking myself “life” questions…questions like “who I am in this world?” and “why am I here?” 

In order to find the answers, I desperately interrogated all the adults in my life, thinking “old” age is what determined knowledge to the answers.

By this time, my faith had weakened by the perceived feeling of rejection from my dad and multiple tough trials at my young age.

When you know who you are, you will know why you are here.

Shirley Solis, Tweet This

But I kept seeking…

Little by little I would come across one minor clue about who I am and why I am here. One small answer satisfied my unquenchable desire to know my place in this world, but only for a time. When the hunger would rise up again, I simply would re-start the search. This journey took me from asking the high school guidance counselor, the drunk lady at my telemarketing job, reading books about aliens and other books about living multiple lives and interpreting my dreams. Thankfully, this journey also took me through the traditional experience of faith I had come across when I was a little girl, living with my grandmother.

“Abuelita Albita” [Grandma Albita], like we called her, read a giant black Catholic Bible to me every night. In those beautiful golden pages, my sense of wonder was cemented in knowing there was [and is] a God who knew all things and who was wise beyond what I could comprehend.

And so it was that at the age of 20, I returned to the seeds my grandmother planted and understood God loved me and wanted a relationship with me. As a result, I started to do all the things I could imagine “pleased” God- go to church, read my Bible, fast, pray and gather with other like minded folks.

Our answers to life questions come because you ask and seek and knock at the doorsteps of your Creator.

Shirley Solis, Tweet This

I spent 13 years doing those things, thinking they would bring me to a true knowledge of God and a true knowledge of who I am and why am I here in this world. While it is true many wonderful truths were planted in my heart during that time, it wasn’t until the most difficult time in my life- finding out my husband had been unfaithful, that my “life” questions really got answered.

In the “depth of despair,” as Anne of Green Gables says, I was broken and lost. All my beliefs were torn down and I was faced with the reality of my shattered life.

It was in that place…in that dark and broken and lonely and desperate place…that God began to build me up and place upon my heart who I really am and why I am here in this world. God began to whisper softly into my heart the truths of who I am.

Who would have imagined those questions would take so long to answer and would come in such painful way.

Interestingly enough, I learned those answers don’t come because of “old” age or because of going to church or because of reading a book or saying a prayer. Those answers come because you ask and seek and because you seek and knock at the doorsteps of your Creator.

Fast forward almost six years from that season of my life and I am in full knowledge of who I am.

I am not just one thing.

I am not just my name.

I am not just my functions.

I am a marvelous creation, wonderfully and fearfully made. I am created for a specific purpose and there is NOTHING wrong with me. I am perfect just the way I am. I KNOW THIS. DO YOU KNOW THIS?

If  you’ve ever wondered or asked about who you are, yet you are not able to know with certainty YOU ARE LOVED. YOU ARE NURTURED, YOU ARE PROTECTED, ETC., then I encourage you to invite God into your heart and ask God to tell you who you are.

In pondering upon who I am this week, I was inspired to write the ABC’s of who I am. These “I AM” declarations remind me of the depth and the width and the length of who I am. And while these “I AM” declarations narrow down with sufficient strength the essence of who I am in body, soul and spirit, I am in awe that I am this and SO MUCH MORE!

I felt led to share these spirit inspired “I AM” declarations with you, because I want you to meditate on these. Share them with your children. Read them daily and ask God to allow your every cell to KNOW who you are. When you know who you are, you will know why you are here.


Question: Which of these “I am” declarations will you be meditating on first?

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