The world changes and grows, but life for the “stuck” mother doesn’t…
- The house is an unequivocal chaos of dirty laundry, shoes, toys and knick knacks… day after day.
- The children raise their high pitched voices even to the point of whining and manipulating, so she can come to their rescue… hour after hour.
- Her emotions are clustered in a sea of guilt and numbness, surrounded by a mask that allows her to keep functioning… minute after minute.
The future seems dark, desperate and void against the avalanche of circumstances too big for her to handle alone. All while the demands, of what seems like a thousand voices, call her name and rip every inch of her emotional skin off, diminishing the little energy she has left.
There are several habits that keep the “stuck” mother from being able to escape her current misery:
1) She is doing life alone- Different circumstances in life have taught her to do life alone and have confirmed that if something is going to get done, it has to be done by her- ALONE. If she ever has the guts to ask for help, she knows the answer before she even asks… and the answer is she won’t be supported. This is the reality that SHE has created and she will stay that way until she makes a different decision- with the help of someone outside of her, whose main purpose will be to help her create a new reality, empowering her with tools she didn’t have before.
2) She is acting disempowered- When she has the opportunity to get support to move through her current reality, she sabotages herself and thinks through all the reasons why it won’t work for her. She also comes up with all the reasons why SHE can’t do it. She rationalizes against the requirements to make a change and makes herself think “it’s not that bad.” Nobody can help her here… SHE has to decide to do something different. In deciding, she becomes strong and empowered to create a new reality in her marriage and with her family.
3) She does not act independently- Our world requires us to be interdependent- independent and dependent- at the same time. She has depended on her husband for change. She has depended on God to save her (without recognizing her part). But she has not acted independently for herself. SHE has not made the decision as an individual to make her life better, and in turn make life for her family better. She has not taken personal ownership. In order to take ownership, she has to understand that God can and will use her to be a catalyst of change. Then and only then, can she seek the support of a mentor to begin the journey of progress.
Going from stuck to building momentum is easier than you think... All it takes is for you to know YOU and YOUR children deserve a happy and fulfilling life and then you have to be humble enough to ask for help. I’d love to personally help you, because I’ve been in your shoes and I know how you feel. If you are ready, I encourage you to schedule a 1-1 call with me soon.
I am looking forward to speaking with you! I believe in you and I believe in your family. You are the hope of our future.
Can’t wait to hear from you!
Shirley Solis
Master Certified Peak Performance Coach
Creator of Powerful Parenting Academy
P.S. Stuck /stək/ Be fixed in a particular position or unable to move or be moved. Be unable to progress with a task or find the answer or solution to something. Remain in a specified place or situation, typically one perceived as tedious or unpleasant. Be at a loss for or in need of. Unable to get rid of or escape from.
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